According to many studies, money is the number one reason why many couples argue. There will come a point in a new romance, where the issue of money will arise. Perhaps you are thinking about having a night out at an expensive restaurant, or are booking a weekend away? Everyone has different salaries and more importantly, different spending habits and capabilities.
One of the most important things to remember when talking about money is that in any new relationship, you should tread carefully. Here are our top tips for dealing with a money issue unscathed:
Remember that everyone is different: Perhaps you’re on £60K, while they are on £16K or the other way round. Sometimes people are dealing with different money issues that have left them out of pocket, such as paying off student loans or divorce. Also everyone likes to spend differently – you might be the kind of person who blows their month’s salary within the first week of it landing in your bank account, while they squirrel away savings into an ISA. Whatever your new partner’s money situation, you need to accept it.
Take small steps: If you can see the relationship lasting the long haul and think your partner’s spending habits need some serious work, then go slowly. Start by suggesting they work out a budget to see why they are going into their overdraught every month, or give them an incentive to save, such as putting money away each month to go on holiday.
Be open: In most relationships, one person assumes more financial responsibility. However, money issues always need to be kept in the open and discussed. If your partner always pays for dinner because they earn more, for example, once in a while offer to split the bill.
Keep it neutral: Find a neutral time to talk about money and always try to keep the conversation relaxed. Bear in mind that not everyone feels happy or confident talking about money in a new relationship, so be patient.
See it from your partner’s perspective: Studies show that when it comes to money, men and women often have differing views when it comes to finances. Women see money as a sign of security and stability and prefer to save for emergencies, while men take more risks with money and see any issues as a threat to their self-esteem. Apparently. Whatever your situation, try to understand your partner’s perspective.
Have you had the money talk yet?
Do you have any other tips you think might help?
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