The Friend Zone. This is a pretty grey area of existence, populated by frustrated types trying to drop hints, move in for the kill, have “the conversation” or basically do anything to get beyond being someone’s bestie.
Everyone has been there at some point: met a guy or girl, swapped numbers, become friends and then basically stalled in the no-mans-land that is the ‘Friend Zone.’
Is this you? Quick, come this way. Here are out top tips on how to escape:
Don’t be so available
From late-night taxi rides, to long and deep counselling sessions consoling them over their latest break-up, beware of becoming your friend’s “go-to” person, who will just drop everything at the drop of a hat to cater to their ever-increasing needs. If you’re not always there with a comforting shoulder for them to cry on, they will appreciate you more in the long run.
Make it more about you
Be more confident in yourself and what you bring to the table. When you’re in the Friend Zone, the relationship is already more imbalanced, because you are investing more into it than they are. Take a step back and avoid being seen as desperate or needy in any way. If you are willing to walk away, it gives you power and you’re far more likely to get the result you want.
Create some competition
We’re not normally into game playing, but it’s a fact that a little bit of jealously goes a long way when it comes to turning someone’s head. Broaden your social circle and make friends with more people of the opposite sex. There’s scientific research to show your friend is more likely to want your attention when they think they might lose you to someone else…
Ask them for their help
Ask your friend to help you because the more time and energy they invest in the friendship, the more you will mean to them. This is known as the Benjamin Franklin affect. This is because we justify our actions to ourselves – that we did them a favour because we liked them. Benjamin Franklin said: “He that has once done you a kindness will be more ready to do you another than he whom you yourself have obliged.”
Be cool with it
For some there can be nothing worse than having a friend that you fancy who doesn’t feel it back. Seeing them in all their gorgeousness on a regular basis is like a form of sick torture. But ask yourself, would you rather have them out of your life completely? It just means having one more friend you like being around, which quite frankly, can only be a good thing. And anyway, the less you worry the more confident you will appear, which helps you seem a more viable option.
Feel this shirt? Yep, that’s boyfriend or girlfriend material…
Good luck people! Anyone out there managed to escape the Friend Zone?
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