Butterflies in your tummy? Heart a little fluttery? Hands a little clammy? Stick out your tongue…yep. You’re suffering from a condition known as ‘first-date-itus.’ It affects many singletons but luckily – it’s curable.
And here’s a secret. We bet your date is feeling just as nervous as you. Besides, look at you! What are you worried about? I know. You’re only human, right? Jitters are natural, it shows you are human and that you care. Well we love you already.
C’mon, take our hand (oooh, clammy) here’s how to calm those first date nerves…
Coffee perks: Picking a less informal and bustling environment such as a coffee bar or cafe, takes the pressure off an ‘intense’ first date situation. The great thing about a coffee date rather than a dinner date is that you have a quick get our clause should they really not be what you expected, ie: ‘must get back to work, gotta write a blog.’ No look, we really have! Tell yourself pre-date, ‘I can leave after one quick coffee if I want to.’ You’re in control. Oh what you don’t want to leave? Then your date is going great.
Arrive early: This gives you an advantage and allows you to settle into the date venue, check your surroundings, locate the loo, commence final spinach in teeth cheek, maybe even order a quickie glass of Dutch Courage? Breathe. Now keep an eye on the door…
Text or call a friend: If you’ve got time pre-date, ask a mate to remind you why you really are the ‘catch of the century.’ Panic if this request is followed by a long pause…(kidding) There ya go, laughing helps too.
Icebreakers: All of us, if we’re honest, get a little nervous before a first date no matter how many times we’ve been there. It’s totally natural. The best thing to do, we think, is to get it out in the open. Say it out loud. “Don’t know about you but I always get a little nervous on a first date…” People often appreciate the human touch, it lightens the mood and they’ll either try to put you at ease or admit they feel the same way!
Try to be you: A first date can feel a little like a job interview. You’re selling yourself (not literally we hope, that’s a whole different site) so it’s tempting to sometimes offer a slightly ‘fake’ version of your true self. In a bid to impress, we can find ourselves exaggerating salaries, jobs and telling little white lies. Silly though, as if they do turn out to be our long-term soul mate, they’ll soon find you out, and if not, you’ll never see them again anyway. It’s so much easier being you isn’t it? It’s the real you that you want them to fall in love with after all…
Ask yourself: What is the worst that can happen. They won’t fancy you. That’s what we fear really, isn’t it? Rejection hurts but even the most seemingly perfect people get rejected I mean, our Becky in admin doesn’t even fancy George Clooney! So what if they don’t message you again, they weren’t for you after all. But that does not mean you won’t be the next date’s ‘cup of jo.’ You will be. Say it. Believe it.
Do you have any more tips for calming first-date nerves? Tell us @Lovestruck
Enjoy these tips? You may also like: Five Tips For Handling Rejection (not that you’ll need them!)
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