Does your fear of being single mean you are tempted to settle? Are you scared of being alone? Then you’re not the only one.
A new study at the University of Toronto has shown that being scared of being left on the shelf is a meaningful predictor of settling for less-than-desirable partners or staying in an unhappy relationship.
The researchers completed seven studies on adults across the US and Canada looking at how the fear of being alone affected romantic relationships, using online questionnaires and surveys. The results, published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, revealed that of the 153 people taking part in one study, 40 per cent said they feared not having a long-term partner, 18 per cent were scared of “spinsterhood”, 11 per cent didn’t want to get older on their own, 7 per cent were worried they would never have children and 4 per cent were scared about negative judgments from others about their single status. Worryingly 0.7 per cent of those questioned said they would rather be in an unhappy relationship than be single and 7 per cent said they feel worthless if they don’t have a partner.
Combining the studies together – and some involved thousands of participants, the researchers found that due to fear of being on their own, many people settled or stayed in unhealthy relationships.
“Those with stronger fears about being single are willing to settle for less in their relationships,” says lead author Stephanie Spielmann. “Sometimes they stay in relationships they aren’t happy in, and sometimes they want to date people who aren’t very good for them.
“Now we understand that people’s anxieties about being single seem to play a key role in 
these types of unhealthy relationship behaviours.”
The co-author added that men and women have the same fears about staying single, which lead to similar behaviours, rather than the view that women struggle most with singledom.
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