Top five steps to the perfect first message

Writer’s block?

The page is blank and has been for five minutes. You write something, then delete it, write I love yousomething else, your hands start sweating and you then delete that…. Emailing a stranger to show your interest is never an easy task and there’s no denying that saying the right thing could definitely lead to more conversation or a meeting, so choose your words carefully.

Here are our top five points for nailing that first email:

Create an interesting subject: Don’t panic, you don’t need to be Shakespeare, just go for something light-hearted. Keep it personal, so if they like a certain film or book, use a line from that to show you’ve read their profile, and are interested in what they have to say.

Use their name: Many studies have shown that people like to hear their own name used in conversation and warm towards the person who is using it. So say “Hi XX” rather than a generic “hi”.

Ask questions: Everyone likes to talk about themselves, so make sure you ask them questions. Use open questions that require a full answer, rather than ones that just require a yes or no answer and tailor your questions to pictures to have seen or something they have said in their profile.

Don’t talk TOO much: It’s good to keep a first email to someone short and sweet. Don’t feel you have to say too much about yourself, because if they are interested they will look at your profile to find out more, just aim to get the chat started.

Time it right: Even if you are curled up on the sofa in a onesie at 9pm on a Saturday night, waiting on an emailyou want to give the impression of being very busy and in demand, so time your email right. Stick to neutral times, like lunchtimes or early evenings. The best time to send an email is when you are off out, so you are not sat indoors, pressing the refresh button waiting for a reply.

See? That wasn’t too hard was it? Good luck and let us know how you got on @lovestruck

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