Do you share textual chemistry?
Are you textually compatible?
Does it matter? It does to some. With more and more couples meeting online, giving ‘good text’ has not only become a important tool for the initial flirty seduction stage pre-date, but has fast become the very foundations upon which a future relationship might be built. Giving ‘bad text’ in the early stages of dating can be a deal-breaker for some.
Is your repartee witty? Do you sound too laid back, use too many emojis, sound like an eight year old, say enough, sound too dull, use too many LOL’s? As a date will scrutinise how you talk, what you say and how you look face-to-face, so today’s digital dater will do the same with your text banter, analysing your text speak for signs of compatibility. Yikes.
According to a 2015 poll by the Gravitate Research Group, 80 per cent of people said they prefer texting to calling, and the average person spends 26 minutes texting every day, more so when flirting and dating. Texting ain’t going anywhere fast.
But come on. Should we be so quick to judge the compatibility of a partner based on their texting etiquette? And here’s another thing, guys and gals text differently anyway don’t they? Studies show gals tend to use more emoji’s, LOL’s, xxx’s and generally say a bit more where the guys might appear more matter-of-fact and dare we say it, emotionless? And then there’s how often you’re getting text. Who’s guilty of sending a text and wondering why you’ve not got a response in under 10 minutes?
But take ‘Lisa’ in our office. She has a long-term boyfriend who will text her a mere few words a week with very little expression or emotion shown simply because he views texting as ‘not a real form’ of communication and actually, a little bit of an inconvenience. He’ll replies with one word, ‘yeah’ usually one day after her texted question which really winds her up. But Lisa is cool with this because he adores her and face-to-face she actually can’t shut him up, often leaving the room to go and have a shower and returning to find him still talking.
This reaffirms the fact we don’t always get a true indication of someone’s TRUE personality from how they text and perhaps we shouldn’t be too quick to judge them until we actually MEET.
However, there is no denying you can probably tell a few personality traits from a text. Lots of exclamation marks indicate they are usually fairly excitable!!! You can tell if someone is humorous from their witty puns and well thought out text responses may indicate someone who’ll potentially be as thoughtful in a relationship.
But don’t forget, this can work the other way. They could be keen to mimic your text speak to sound more like the kind of person you want them to be thus appearing more textually compatible. Remember, texting gives them the time to think about their replies, delete, start again, phone a friend so that sometimes that excitable punner can seem like a complete different person in the flesh.
In conclusion? We’re with Lisa’s guy. Text is not real talk and some dates don’t take it too seriously because they feel there’s never any substitute for testing real chemistry in real time with a real flesh and blood date. And there isn’t.
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